6 votes

Is it wrong to be a "people pleaser"?

This is an important topic. AN4.95:1.1: “Mendicants, these four people are found in the world. What four? There are those who practice to benefit neither themselves nor others. It creates no ...
  • 8,937
5 votes
Accepted

Audio guided meditation recommendations?

The "How To Meditate" YouTube video playlist by Yuttadhammo Bhikkhu is highly recommended. It includes both sitting and walking meditation. This is more like vipassana meditation based on the four ...
  • 34.2k
5 votes

How to stop rejecting / avoiding things?

Very good question, focused on real and useful problem. Mind generates aversion when things go contrary to what it believes is "right". This belief is called "attachment". For ...
  • 55.8k
3 votes

A beginner facing Culadasa

"If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him." Err... not literally... The point of this quip is that attachment to a teacher is itself something that must be overcome. Even if you are lucky enough ...
  • 4,480
3 votes
Accepted

Safe vs Risky Path

Making good decisions is hard. Let's take a look at a Buddhist perspective. Good decisions are unprejudiced (AN4.18): Making decisions unprejudiced by favoritism, hostility, stupidity, and ...
  • 8,937
3 votes

Is it wrong to be a "people pleaser"?

I suppose you please people by saying things that are agreeable and endearing to them. According to MN 58 below, it is not appropriate to say agreeable and endearing things, if they are unfactual and ...
  • 34.2k
3 votes

How to overcome fear for lost of opportunity?

In Buddhism, you can choose to be a lay follower, who observes the five precepts and the non-noble version of the path (which has defilements remaining) as a lay person, or you can follow the Noble ...
  • 34.2k
3 votes

How come movies/video games decrease the motivation to do buddhist practises?

What happened to me? How those videos cause me to lost my interest for buddhism? How I lost that resistance? I suspect something you wrote points to the answer – you wrote that college work stressed ...
  • 71
2 votes

Audio guided meditation recommendations?

Ajahn Jayasaro has a lot of Dhamma talks, Q&As and guided meditation sessions. Just look up on YouTube.
  • 2,550
2 votes

Where can one find guidance from a teacher next year in 2018?

The oral study system, mukkhapatha, still going on at pa-auk monastery. By this study system, you can practice every meditation step by step. The teacher will teach you just a bit per meeting for ...
  • 5,907
2 votes

Safe vs Risky Path

A lot of the teaching was for monks not laypeople, though e.g. a book like this one summarises what he did teach to laypeople -- e.g. about working for a living, cooperating and so on. Rather than "...
  • 43.6k
2 votes

How do I recognize the attachment to certain things?

You might want to distinguish between "attachment" and "craving" -- Why do the Noble Truths talk about 'craving', instead of about 'attachment'? -- it's more specifically "craving" ...
  • 43.6k
2 votes

How do I let go the ownership of the mind?

This is due to subtle Upadana. (clinging) There are three kinds of clinging. -Kama Upadana (it seems you have less of this) -Dithi upadana -Atta upadana. (perhaps this is your problem) -Silabbatha ...
  • 5,578
2 votes

Relaxation vs Laziness

Well, if you can't recognize the difference it is laziness. Relaxation is samadhi: the collection of mind around an object of meditation. When we speak of conventional relaxation, what we really ...
2 votes

What should I avoid to maintain sati?

the condition for sati is proper attention I say that mindfulness and situational awareness is fueled by something, it’s not unfueled. And what is the fuel for mindfulness and situational ...
  • 1,594
2 votes

Is it wrong to be a "people pleaser"?

One of the phrases I remember is from the Kalama sutta Now, Kalamas, don't go by reports, by legends, by traditions, by scripture, by logical conjecture, by inference, by analogies, by agreement ...
  • 43.6k
2 votes

How important is patience in buddhism?

Khanti/patience is indeed a very important virtue to cultivate. It's listed in Sn 2.4 as among one of the greatest protection for a practitioner. Also refer to many other related suttas. Patience, ...
  • 9,628
2 votes

Do we have to believe that good people exists?

Believing that good people exist is like believing that young children will mature in wisdom and intelligence. Sometimes it's hard to watch a two year old in the middle of a tantrum and think "...
  • 4,480
1 vote

What should I avoid to maintain sati?

The Buddha is a bit circular on this point: SN46.51:18.1: And what starves the arising of the awakening factor of mindfulness, or, when it has arisen, starves its full development? There are ...
  • 8,937
1 vote

Should we care about what others think?

Yes, as long as this would boost the desire to abandon what is unwholesome and undertake what is wholesome. these two bright qualities guard the world. Which two? Shame & compunction. If these ...
  • 447
1 vote
Accepted

Should we care about what others think?

Maybe if it's people that cares about you and your spiritual progress. Good friendship with good advices/criticism is a treasure to be protected. In the Dhammapada, we see that: Should one a man ...
1 vote

Should we care about what others think?

Tryin to project one's self-image into the minds of others is a source of suffering1. So one should look inwardly and constraint oneself with the precepts and also develop the Brahavihara and be ...
1 vote

Doing the opposite of not skillfull things

MN8 is a notable sutta that has a long list of skillful qualities, forty-four to be exact. Here is the first: MN8:13.1: Cunda, I say that even giving rise to the thought of skillful qualities is ...
  • 8,937
1 vote

Is it necessary to be socialize to understand dhamma?

Ānanda brought a similar question to the Buddha, attempting to hedge and bridge the issue of solitude and social interaction: SN3.18:3.3: ‘Sir, good friends, companions, and associates are half the ...
  • 8,937

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