what is this state i am undergoing?

Question

I have been practicing meditation now for more than a year. I found that in recent months I go to a state where I am not bored, not happy, not dull, not tired but it is some state I find myself keeping it to myself. Really I couldn’t explain it fully. Did anyone go to a state like this ? Any explanation ?

Answer 1

It sounds like "equanimity", which is a normal result of meditation.

Answer 2

That's perfectly common. You might even call that "phase one" of meditation, the place where you begin to disengage from the outside world and your own internal monologue. Here, you are just getting a taste of what the mind is like as it moves toward emptiness and concentration. You'll most likely stay at this point unless you push yourself a bit. Try adding another 20 minutes and ensure that you are doing this everyday.

If you persist, don't get discouraged. There's a long dark period between what you've arrived at and the first stirrings of absorption. Getting there takes time, effort, and quite a bit of dedication. It's made doubly difficult because for a very long time, it's going to feel like nothing is happening. Just keep watching your breath. Don't try to make anything happen. Eventually something will arise all of it's own.

Answer 3

There is a Sutta formula to make an assessment of yourself. I use this often to understand my mental state. You find this formula in many suttas. However one should be cautious to not to miss read or miss interpreted the individual attainment. For instance, a Sotapanna does not break the five precepts. But not every person observe five precepts a Sotapanna.

"There is the case where a monk — quite withdrawn from sensuality, withdrawn from unskillful qualities — enters and remains in the first jhana: rapture and pleasure born from withdrawal, accompanied by directed thought and evaluation. He permeates and pervades, suffuses and fills this very body with the rapture and pleasure born from withdrawal. There is nothing of his entire body unpervaded by rapture and pleasure born from withdrawal."

https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ptf/dhamma/sacca/sacca4/samma-samadhi/jhana.html

Answer 4

As to such "states", householder SGN might investigate for himself, especially whether his meditations are for the purpose in the world, or proper based, as a means to escape from the dangers lasting, since dwelling and developing householder equanimity is neither of great fruits nor very secure, leads possible to long bad states.

"And what are the six kinds of household equanimity? The equanimity that arises when a foolish, deluded person — a run-of-the-mill, untaught person who has not conquered his limitations or the results of action (2) & who is blind to danger (3) — sees a form with the eye. Such equanimity does not go beyond the form, which is why it is called household equanimity. (Similarly with sounds, smells, tastes, tactile sensations, & ideas.)

"And what are the six kinds of renunciation equanimity? The equanimity that arises when — experiencing the inconstancy of those very forms, their change, fading, & cessation — one sees with right discernment as it actually is that all forms, past or present, are inconstant, stressful, subject to change: This equanimity goes beyond form, which is why it is called renunciation equanimity. (Similarly with sounds, smells, tastes, tactile sensations, & ideas.)

"'The thirty-six states to which beings are attached should be known': thus was it said. And in reference to this was it said.

Path and right view as first factor of the path are not gained by meditation, but by listening the good Dhamma and proper attention! To reach a state of access, its very required to stick with merits and to access borderlands.

(Note that this Dhamma gift is not given for trade, exchange, stacks, entertainments to bind or conduct demerits with it, but for release from this wheel)