Is this claim about attitudes as you die correct?

Question

I don't believe you can die when in absorption (at least if you are reborn), but tricycle says

The attitude of the mind at death is very important, Buddhists believe. The less fear and aversion we experience at death, and the more focus, calm, and equanimity we have, the more likely we will be reborn in good circumstances. Which is why preparing the mind for death through meditation is a core element of Buddhist practice.

Is there a reference for claims of their sort?

If so, then how do we cultivate the right attitude, and does it really matter at all, given that results are about our own karma, rather than what happens at the end of this life or even one more life.

Answer 1

Religion is full of 'get rich quick' schemes and this sounds like one of them; as though a person can spend their life not developing the mind then miraculously, before they die, they will miraculously cultivate an enlightened thought that saves them from an imagined damnation.

Last night, for the first ever, my mother was too scared to go to bed, thinking she was going to die if she went to sleep. That evening, she had some experiences of strong dizziness, due to obviously a worsening lung & carotid artery condition. I said to her death is peaceful & a rest from the sufferings of this life. She immediately went to & had a very good long night's sleep. Then, early this morning, I looked into her room to see her sleeping on her side; differently to her sleeping position on her back last night. When I returned home from my early morning swim, I looked into her room again (to check if she was still alive), to see her bed was neatly perfectly made. Then I walked into the kitchen and she was pottering around as usual; cooking; and then asked me if I had any clothes that needed washing.

When people are old and start to have diminished mental faculties, there is generally not much they can spiritually cultivate. If we cannot develop some Right Views in the prime of life, its unlikely it will be developed just before death, when the body & mind are weak or in a modern hospital stuffed with tubes & wires; mentally tranquilized on various medicines.

Obviously, if there is 'rebirth' or a 'day of judgment' (as found in other religions), as taught in the suttas (and in other religions), all of the life's kamma (including kamma that has resolved past bad kamma) will be taken into account.

For example, if my mother passes away deliriously with angry & frustrated thoughts about why doctors could not cure her at 87 years of age (which are irrational thoughts she sometimes has), this obviously would not mean she will be reborn as a demon. Obviously my mother continues to have the same maternal disposition she has had for most of her life; she still mostly enjoys performing benevolent actions for family & friends. Obviously, any resistance she has to death (which may cause anger & frustration) are due to her continuing desire to perform maternal actions. Therefore, obviously, if there is 'rebirth', my mother will be reborn with a maternal disposition rather than a demonic disposition.

Some suttas about disposition at the time of death include:

• AN 11.16, which says:

Monks, eleven advantages are to be expected from the release (deliverance) of heart by familiarizing oneself with thoughts of loving-kindness (metta), by the cultivation of loving-kindness, by constantly increasing these thoughts, by regarding loving-kindness as a vehicle (of expression), and also as something to be treasured, by living in conformity with these thoughts, by putting these ideas into practice, and by establishing them. What are the eleven? 1. "He sleeps in comfort. 2. He awakes in comfort. 3. He sees no evil dreams. 4. He is dear to human beings. 5. He is dear to non-human beings. 6. Devas (gods) protect him. 7. Fire, poison, and sword cannot touch him. 8. His mind can concentrate quickly. 9. His countenance is serene. 10. He dies without being confused in mind. 11. If he fails to attain arahantship (the highest sanctity) here and now, he will be reborn in the brahma-world.

• SN 55.21, which says:

Have no fear, Mahanama! Have no fear! Your death will not be a bad one, your demise will not be bad. If one's mind has long been nurtured with conviction, nurtured with virtue, nurtured with learning, nurtured with relinquishment, nurtured with discernment, then when the body — endowed with form, composed of the four primary elements, born from mother & father, nourished with rice & porridge, subject to inconstancy, rubbing, pressing, dissolution & dispersion — is eaten by crows, vultures, hawks, dogs, hyenas, or all sorts of creatures, nevertheless the mind — long nurtured with conviction, nurtured with virtue, learning, relinquishment, & discernment — rises upward and separates out.

• SN 55.54, which says:

Mahanama, a discerning lay follower who is diseased, in pain, severely ill should be reassured by another discerning lay follower with four reassurances: 'Be reassured, friend, that you are [already] endowed with verified confidence in the Awakened One... you have verified confidence in the Dhamma... you have verified confidence in the Sangha... you [already] have virtues appealing to the noble ones: untorn, unbroken, unspotted, unsplattered, liberating, praised by the wise, untarnished, leading to concentration.'

• AN 4.84, which says:

[The Blessed One said:] Brahman, there are those who, subject to death, are afraid & in terror of death. And there are those who, subject to death, are not afraid or in terror of death. And who is the person who, subject to death, is afraid & in terror of death? There is the case of the person who has not abandoned passion, desire, fondness, thirst, fever & craving for sensuality. Then he comes down with a serious disease. As he comes down with a serious disease, the thought occurs to him, 'O, those beloved sensual pleasures will be taken from me, and I will be taken from them!' He grieves & is tormented, weeps, beats his breast, & grows delirious. This is a person who, subject to death, is afraid & in terror of death.

It can be discerned, from merely the four quotes above, how the Dhamma and non-dhamma attitudes are cultivated throughout life; rather than at the last moment.

Therefore, while my mother (similar to AN 4.84) may still have attachment to sensuality, last night with a reassuring few words & touch, my mother slept peacefully, as though she had had enough dispassion of life and was ready to rest. Possibly she simply needed my approval to rest; because she still believes she has a duty/purpose to look after her children. I suppose i am saying when it comes the time to pass away, most people will have a dispassionate instinct to pass away; that even much of their religious indoctrination about past & futures lives will not even be in their mind.

Answer 2

https://suttacentral.net/mn136/en/sujato?lang=en&layout=plain&reference=none&notes=asterisk&highlight=false&script=latin

Now, Ānanda, take the case of the person here who killed living creatures … and had wrong view, and who is reborn in a heavenly realm. They must have done a good deed to be experienced as pleasant either previously or later, or else at the time of death they undertook right view. And that’s why, when their body breaks up, after death, they’re reborn in a good place, a heavenly realm.

Answer 3

Just some points I would like to highlight for considerations. As mentioned by the other answers, how we practise giving, virtues and cultivate our mind consistently (through faith in the Triple Gems) will affect our mental attitude when the end comes and as the Buddha also stated in SN55.22

"Suppose a tree were leaning toward the east, slanting toward the east, inclining toward the east. When its root is cut, which way would it fall?"

However, a sudden mishap might still derail even a well-trained mind. I recall hearing a talk by a monk (was it Ajahn Brahm?) that if there is a sudden event at the time of death which caused the mind to be upset, agitated, sad or tumultuous then it is possible that it would negatively affect the subsequent rebirth experience. It would be like a world class gymnast who trained hard all their life but came down with severe flu at the Olympic finals. Perhaps, the story of Queen Mallika’s death would be a reminder; don’t let regrets in our lives fester till the end. It is important to address our guilt/remorse early while we can. So that when the time comes, we know we had done all that we can. And if it still did not go as expected then it is just not meant to be. Thus, I think it is important towards the twilight of our lives, to learn to make peace with ourselves and others; it’s a way to let go of this life and its attachments.

I think the last point is that the moment when our mind retreat into a lower state whether in a coma or because of dying, once pass the point of no return, the trajectory is set. Because once the mind no longer has access to memories of its life experiences, any recollection of the Dharma is impossible. Without recollection (of the Dharma), any chance to uplift and cultivate the mind is gone. It is just not possible to change the mind’s trajectory. This will likely remain the case until the mind is reborn in another body when new opportunities may arise. I think in a way this is a protection as well. Imagine a being in a coma or whose physical body had died but it remembers vivid details of its human existence, its family, possessions and so on. It will want to break free, go back and not be willing to move on.

Answer 4

Yes there is a reference: AN 6:16 shows clearly that the Buddha taught one's state of mind to be important at death. It concerns a couple who are shown in the suttas to both have confidence in the Buddha. Here, the husband is ill and being instructed by his wife:

“Don’t be worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death."

Her skillful approach shows that, at death, it's important to think in such ways that undercut one's worldly attachments and concerns relating to the present life. The fact that the Buddha criticises being worried at death is enough to infer that one's circumstances after death would be improved by abandoning this unskilful state of mind before passing away.

It can be further inferred that a lack of greed, aversion and delusion present in one's mind will improve one's post-mortem circumstances by the fact that stream-enterers have abandoned the level of greed, aversion and delusion that would lead to lower realms, and that non-returners - having totally abandoned irritation and sensual passion - are destined to be reborn in the highest heavenly realm: the Pure Abodes.

Regarding the ability to die while in concentration: see the Buddha's parinibbāna in DN 16 and the parinibbāna of Ven. Dabba Mallaputta in Ud 8:9 for proof that it can be done. There are also lay non-returners in the suttas who declare the ability to enter jhāna as and when they wish - AN 7:50. Since non-returners have perfected concentration they would all likely be free from the hindrances at death simply by virtue of their highly purified minds.