Heello, I am not really Buddhist - although I do read sutras and have some general inkling - or anything at all. I like to do drugs, drink, and other discretionary acts, however I am considering taking a breather from these habits in order to take revenge on a community of people I more or less despise. I would prefer to drink, experiment, and be absorbed in my own creation, but it really screws me up physically, and then the people here like to exploit me - they enjoy seeing me miserable and groveling for mercy. My question is should I cultivate my revenge tactic?, since it is the only thing that is keeping me from enjoying myself via my vices? I guess the physical pain is not enough to keep me from stopping. I'm sure you understand...
p.s. Just to be clear, the revenge is not giving the people a reason to be so proud and smug by being drug-free, and the only way I would be drug-free is by keeping up my hateful feelings towards them. I can't imagine doing it any other way.