• Suffering comes from insecurity.
• Insecurity comes from fear.
• Fear comes from beliefs.
• Beliefs come from knowledge.
• Knowledge comes from good and bad.
• Good and bad come from desire.

Thus, there are 4 ways to remove fear:

1

Identify the beliefs that are causing you fear. Change those beliefs. Fear will vanish.

How to change your beliefs?

Realize that all your beliefs which are the cause of your fear are based on future assumptions. Thus, your beliefs have no weight in the present moment.

Realize that most beliefs are not rational. If you had a few bad experiences in the past, it does not mean that all similar experiences will end badly.

Test your beliefs to reject their validity. If you're afraid of something, and you are sure that your fear is irrational, face your fear and realize nothing bad will happen.

There are many many ways to change your beliefs. That's why psychologists exist.

2

Gain new knowledge. Specifically about your situation in the relationship. Remember, knowledge is rational, not emotional. Use your rational mind. Be a scientist. Read books about your situation. Read about relationships. Speak with people who had similar problems and have solved them.

3

Eliminate "good and bad" thinking. How to eliminate "good and bad" thinking?

Realize there is no good and bad. How? By realizing: "What one person thinks is good, another person thinks it's bad. What I think is good, another person thinks it's bad". Thus, something that is good can be at the same time good and bad. Something that is bad can be at the same time bad and good. If something can be black and white at the same time, which color is it? Think about it. Which color is it?

4

Eliminate desire. How to eliminate desire?

Follow the four noble truths: Realize that desire is the cause of suffering. Realize that putting an end to desire, suffering no longer arises. Find the path leading to the elimination of desire.

• Suffering comes from insecurity.
• Insecurity comes from fear.
• Fear comes from beliefs.
• Beliefs come from knowledge.
• Knowledge comes from good and bad.
• Good and bad come from desire.

Thus, there are 4 ways to remove fear:

1

Identify the beliefs that are causing you fear. Change those beliefs. Fear will vanish.

How to change your beliefs?

Realize that all your beliefs which are the cause of your fear are based on future assumptions. Thus, your beliefs have no weight in the present moment.

Realize that most beliefs are not rational. If you had a few bad experiences in the past, it does not mean that all similar experiences will end badly.

Test your beliefs to reject their validity. If you're afraid of something, and you are sure that your fear is irrational, face your fear and realize nothing bad will happen.

There are many many ways to change your beliefs. That's why psychologists exist.

2

Gain new knowledge. Specifically about your situation in the relationship. Remember, knowledge is rational, not emotional. Use your rational mind. Be a scientist. Read books about your situation. Read about relationships. Speak with people who had similar problems and have solved them.

3

Eliminate "good and bad" thinking. How to eliminate "good and bad" thinking?

Realize there is no good and bad. How? By realizing: "What one person thinks is good, another person thinks it's bad. What I think is good, another person thinks it's bad". Thus, something that is good can be at the same time good and bad. Something that is bad can be at the same time bad and good. If something can be black and white at the same time, which color is it? Think about it. Which color is it?

4

This is what Buddhist would do.

"Eliminate" desire. How to eliminate desire?

Follow the four noble truths: Realize that desire is the cause of suffering. Realize that putting an end to desire, suffering no longer arises. Find the path leading to the elimination of desire.