29
votes
Do buddhists fall in love?
It depends which Buddhism we are talking about:
Both Theravada and Mahayana, including Zen, would consider romantic love a disease of the mind, a kind of pathological obsession. Theravada would offer ...
- 55.2k
24
votes
Relationship with bad parents (kamma and issues)
My father was an alcoholic, and I suffered a lot of grief from him - so I might as well try and answer this one.
The way my first teacher taught me about this (back when my father was still alive and ...
- 55.2k
19
votes
Accepted
Any authentic sutta from any tradition that gives guidance on what kind of partner to choose?
Here's a summary of Chapter 5 of The Buddha's Teachings to Laypeople: Practical Advice for Prosperity and Lasting Happiness.
If you fail to find suitable associates it's better to be "like a solitary ...
- 43.1k
17
votes
How to combine Buddhism with being a parent?
Parents are supposed to practice Brahmavihara towards children. Attachment doesn't benefit them in any way. What benefits them are kindness, compassion, empathetic joy and equanimity. Attachment or ...
- 25.6k
13
votes
Do buddhists fall in love?
All beings "fall in love" as a result of desire (Tanha) and attachment in our mind. Desire is caused by not transcending the true nature of our experience (Avijja). The Buddhist path is to eradicate ...
- 1,601
11
votes
Giving up bad friends
The answer to this question may also depend on the individual and how advanced they are in Buddhist practice. If a person is solid in faith and regular in practice and can truly be that good example ...
- 9,462
10
votes
Accepted
How to combine Buddhism with being a parent?
Love and attachment are only incidentally related. Of course that depends on how you define love.
I would propose that love can be crudely understood as the act of giving. Naturally "investing" ...
- 432
10
votes
Is it possible to have a romantic relationship without attachment?
Is it possible to have a romantic relationship without attachment? Just based on pure love and with equanimity?
I won't say that all relationships must end; but if a relationship doesn't end, one of ...
- 43.1k
10
votes
Accepted
Personal Relationships while on the path?
About 20 years ago I felt the same. People were talking about something pretty meaningless. It was not interesting. Also, according to the Buddhist precept of Mindful Speech, idle chatter should be ...
- 1,485
9
votes
Relationship with bad parents (kamma and issues)
Even if your parents abandoned you the day you were born, you still owe them. The only way to repay them fully is to make them understand the Dhamma. If your parents are alcoholic, take them for rehab....
- 25.6k
8
votes
Accepted
Does avoiding a person mean I have not truly forgiven them?
I believe forgiving and avoiding are two different things. It is important to forgive people for your own peace of mind. Let go of anger and resentment, this will be good for both you and the other ...
- 9,797
7
votes
Accepted
What is Buddhism's view on divorce?
It is frowned upon in cultures influenced by Buddhism depending on the situation. If you are abandoning your family because of your sexual desire or craving towards wealth, fame, power of another ...
- 25.6k
7
votes
Relationship with bad parents (kamma and issues)
There is a aspect of Buddhism which actually views difficult people (including parents) as being helpful and we should be grateful to them. Forbearance (kṣānti) is one of the six perfections. To ...
- 20.8k
7
votes
"Human Dignity" in Buddhism
Dignity in Buddhism is not built-in, it is to be earned. A realized person is respected because they deserve to be respected. If someone can control one's emotions, does not fall victim to one's ...
- 55.2k
7
votes
What does Buddhism say about how to manage other people's anger?
A very apt verse in the case of anger is this one from Dhammapada - Na Hi Verena Verani - Hatred is never appeased by Hatred. It is appeased only by loving kindness.
Here is the Dhamma talk by Ven. ...
- 1,211
7
votes
How can I remove my desire for a relationship/girlfriend?
What helped me tremendously distance myself is this:
Contemplate the various advantages and disadvantages of having a girlfriend--particularly the one that you think you would get--not the dream-woman-...
- 5,065
7
votes
if the self is an illusion - all my relationships are illusion too?
You are asking something like "If superman is fictional, what happens to his relationship with Lois Lane?".
In ultimate reality, relationships don't exit. It's just craving/clinging arising in the ...
- 25.6k
6
votes
Giving up bad friends
First, how bad is "bad"? Second, what are your limits? Third, can you really help? Fourth, is walking away a form of help? Fifth, what does your need of "bad" people say about your path?
First, ...
- 2,231
6
votes
Any authentic sutta from any tradition that gives guidance on what kind of partner to choose?
There is some guidance from the Sigalovada Sutta on the responsibilities of the husband and wife. So, by extension, a suitable partner is one who can fulfil these responsibilities.
"In five ways ...
- 33.5k
6
votes
What are the Buddhist teachings on how best to live a married life?
The Access to Insight website has a number of related translations and essays;
Suttas
How to ensure that you'll be with your spouse in future lives: AN 4.55
Spouses' duties to each other: DN 31
...
- 4,247
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