11

Prevention is better than cure. It is easiest to tackle the mental pollution of unwholesome acts before it has happened - i.e. at the stage that desire is born. For the same reason, help groups like Alchoholics Anonymous say "Say no to the first drink" - call a sponsor or friend and get over the urge. Suicide hotlines work the same way - they would like us ...


8

From the Mettanisamsa Sutta: "Monks, eleven advantages are to be expected from the release (deliverance) of heart by familiarizing oneself with thoughts of loving-kindness (metta), by the cultivation of loving-kindness, by constantly increasing these thoughts, by regarding loving-kindness as a vehicle (of expression), and also as something to be ...


7

The way Trungpa Rinpoche explained metta, you must start with yourself. Sit and love yourself, respect yourself, give yourself a break - until you feel a relief. This may take days, weeks, or months - do not rush. The goal is to recover your sense of your own basic goodness, your fundamental sanity. Often we judge others because we are strict to ourselves. ...


7

You don't need a benefactor to practice that type of metta; you just need someone who is dear to you; it just shouldn't be someone you could potentially desire sexually, or whom you are partial towards, like your children. The stages, according to the Visuddhimagga are as follows: cultivate metta towards yourself (useless, but a good example) cultivate ...


7

Metta meditation will help you to reduce stress caused by hatred. But it won't be much effective against stress caused by craving or clinging. Anapanasati meditation can be used to get away from all kinds of stress and calm the mind. But it may require Metta meditation at the start as it is hard to concentrate, if you get irritated a lot. Ultimately, it is ...


6

The two contradict only to a "confused" (=normal) mind - in which "self" and "others" are two separate things. To the enlightened mind, what's good for one is good for the other, because they dependently-co-emerge. Even in a regular worldly sense, if you think about it, it's impossible to 100% neglect one and only care about the other. If you attempted to ...


5

So this raises a dilemma. Continue being gentle and compassionate with loving kindness, and get eaten. Or react harshly when necessary and risk darkening ourselves. Or, is there a proper middle path? I hope this is a false dilemma. Some of the Buddhist principles that might help you to prosper (rather than "to be eaten") include: Right livelihood (work ...


4

If you think current world is harsh, what essentially you need to understand is, the world only gets worse. Tomorrow is never going to be better than today. Real buddhists should never conflict with the harsh world. They need to understand the transient, evanescent and inconstant nature of the world and attain nibbana as soon as possible while Buddhism ...


4

If you have a child then when your child is happy you are automatically happy, and that happiness you experience is 100% without holding back, that is because your love and compassion for your child is unconditional. The same type of happy feeling you must get if your thoughts are pure towards others happiness. Jealousy is the reason why you cannot feel ...


3

Meditation influences the surrounding by vibration created. (You can really feel the vibration when you experience Piti) So when you pratice as a group these vibrations influence others, especially when you are having a bad patch in meditation then the influence of others will help in to develop calmness and concentration and perhaps dispel agitation and ...


3

Yes Metta is a very very important factor in the art of communication, throughout all the stages of the communication process. Being natural (effortless) and honest is another core trait (Right Speech) as well as having a high level of generosity (dana paramita) There are many others social skill factors, some of which are based on advanced NLP skills (...


3

OP: How can I be happy at other's happiness ? How can I develop my willingness to see others' being happy ? One of the Brahmavihārās meditation subjects is Muditā which is to develop delight at other's well being. Muditā develops happiness at other's happiness. OP: Sometimes, I do loving-kindness meditation. But I'm looking for some kind of understanding ...


3

You are beginning to notice the natural behaviors that we all carry out. This is a great thing as most people don't even take a moment to understand their behavior or how/why it functions that way. As you are noticing like this, all kinds of weird side effects may start arising, as you are really shaking the foundation of the way you perceive the world. Fear ...


2

Kindness is descriptive of a wholesome state of mind encompassing love and compassion. These states of mind arise in the absence of states of mind having greed, anger and delusion. Patience is the characteristic of bearing with some form of suffering (physical and/or mental). Being able to bear with suffering prevents mind states based on anger from ...


2

You already know it. Depressive mind has power to transform whole world to depressive world. Angry mind has power to transform whole word to angry world. Metta mind has power to transform whole world to metta world. When dwelling in depression, everything is depressive. When boiling in anger, everything is angry. When radiating metta, everything is ...


2

How is metta (having desire for someone's well-being) compatible with equanimity? These Dhamma Lists warn that "indifference" is the "near enemy" of "equanimity"; but could you maybe explain briefly what the right view is, how to distinguish indifference from equanimity, or to make equanimity compatible with metta? i entertain ...


2

There are many approaches. A bit of training in mindfulness helps to see our internal moment by moment experiences so we can interact with them with lovingkindness and better understand what's going on with us. The way I do it, developed by listening to guided metta and practicing Satipatthana Vipassana: While smiling, I imagine puppies, kittens or ...


2

Yes, it is recommended in the suttas; here is an excerpt from the Metta Sutta: Thus have I heard: On one occasion the Blessed One was living near Savatthi at Jetavana at Anathapindika's monastery. Then he addressed the monks saying, "Monks." — "Venerable Sir," said the monks, by way of reply. The Blessed One then spoke as follows: "Monks, ...


2

There are clear definitions given in Chapter IX -- The Divine Abidings of the Visuddhimagga: Now, as to the meaning firstly of loving-kindness, compassion, gladness and equanimity: it fattens (mejjati), thus it is loving-kindness (mettá); it is solvent (siniyhati) is the meaning. Also: it comes about with respect to a friend (mitta), [318] or it ...


2

By practicing monastic life, if you mean becoming a monk, it's a no go with your current condition. But if you just want to practice meditation, staying at a monastery, you still have to give up Marijuana and Nicotine. No serious monastery would allow you to smoke while you stay there. Some monasteries allow lay practitioners to take just 5 precepts and ...


2

I think it's a matter of degree, not entirely black-and-white -- how stable you are, how much contact there is between you and of what type, etc. A monk's giving a formal dhamma talk to a polite audience might be not-very-adversely affected, for example. Whereas, conversely, your joining a criminal gang would be maybe not so harmless. It might possibly be ...


2

This is pretty normal, I'm guessing most practitioners go through this phase. You have a certain - valid but incomplete - understanding of Dharma, and so you interpret your observations from this perspective, creating subjective reality that looks somewhat negative. What you see is not wrong, these negative observations are not wrong, but they are a small ...


1

All life is interdependent. Therefore the happiness of one individual depends upon that of others. The Buddha taught the Four Immeasurables - loving-kindness, compassion, appreciative joy and equanimity - in order to remove ill will, cruelty, jealousy, clinging and aversion. In meditation, the Four Immeasurables are extended to all sentient beings. ...


1

It was interesting to note Thich Nhat Hanh’s take on the word MUDITA. Now you have given further interpretation to the Satara Brahma Vihara: Metta (loving kindness), Karuna (compassion), Muditha (altruistic joy) and Upeksha (equanimity). In this reply I will give another third interpretation to the Satara Brahma Vihara, that will help you gain immeasurable ...


1

Say you are an American. (as I do not know your nationality) Now imagine that there is only this earth without any boarders. (no countries but one world) Now imagine we all help and look after each other as one human from earth. We do not have wars between countries. (because there is only one world) Now you expand this concept to whole world without any ...


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