The ancient Greeks imagined the Fates as weavers, spinning out the yarn that makes the fabric of our lives. And it's a useful analogy: our experiential lives are like strands of yarn dragging behind us as we move forward. We have no control over that. We pick up experiences, and they are part of the fabric of our lives as it stretches behind us.
What we do ...
"Personality" ("attabhava"; individual character) is made up of nature (dhamma) & nurture (bhavana), namely:
Genetic structure: the Realized One truly understands the world with its many and diverse elements (anekadhātunānādhātulokaṃ)... dispositions (ānādhimuttikataṃ).. and faculties (indriyaparopariyattaṃ)... MN 12
The Buddha had a personality, for sure. His personality is who he was, moment to moment, but not the result of him desiring to become that personality.
But you are not a Buddha, and much of your life experiences has built upon the habit of creating a self-reinforcing personality. Those habits are part of who you are, moment to moment, the result of deep ...
It sounds you are reaching through a bottleneck of defining your Dharma:)
While moving onto the next level of enlightenment we reassess how we defined ourselves previously to judge if we deem ourselves worthy of breaking through to the next level. Going over history like that flash before our eyes that humanity seems to associate with death/...
When confronted with a situation of this sort, one has a choice between three equally wise options:
Unfortunately, most people choose the fourth or fifth (most unwise) options, that are so artfully depicted by Shakespeare in Hamlet; i.e., either they:
suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or [...] take arms
control and power clicques that work witin rigid structures and do not incorpate the views and contributions of others in sanghas re merely a reflection of those people operate in the real world outside of th sangha - inbussiness and so on ..such habit are ifetimes in the making ..its idealistic to expect otherwise..if there is abise ( a common cntrol issue ...
Your question is not an easy one. Anxiety is not a secondary or auxiliary problem, it's a problem that goes to the very heart of Buddhism and indeed to the very heart of what it means to be alive.
To resolve this problem completely and exhaustively requires complete and perfect penetration into the core principle of Buddhism.
To be perfectly without anxiety ...
Someone once approached Venerable Sariputta in agony.
MN143:4.1: “I’m not keeping well, Master Sāriputta, I’m not alright. The pain is terrible and growing, not fading, its growing, not its fading, is evident. The winds piercing my head are so severe, it feels like a strong man drilling into my head with a sharp point. The pain in my head is so severe, it ...
I find these videos by Ven. Yuttadhammo on anxiety very useful:
Monk Radio: Calming Down, Panic Attack
Monk Radio: Meditation for Anxious People
Q&A: Anxiety and Depression
Monk Radio: Relaxing in Life
If you like to learn more about this type of meditation (Vipassana) practice you can find his introduction video series to the method here.
May you be ...
There are a few ways to detach yourself from someone insulting you that I tend to use.
The first would be practicing something along the lines of ignorance is bliss in which you simply ignore - like water off a ducks back as they say.
Your best friends are using your peripheral vision and assessing inside you are not emotionally affected ...
There is nothing wrong with saving money to support your family.
The premise about money and particularly capitalism that conflicts most with buddhism is that money tends to be gained from the suffering of others. For the most part, the economy is made from need - which implies suffering.
Think of what is needed to build a skyscraper. The metal for the core ...
A full tamed mind would mean a full tamed body, as they are both one and a part of each other.
Impossible? Absolutely not. There is always the possibility an individual has achieved such an incredible feat at some point in time or space. Who knows, there could be many. Impossible is an absolute word, once you believe in impossibility then you limit yourself ...
There are methods to help with anxiety, although not necessarily buddhist.
Here is a meditation which may help. It's called Infinite Bloom; something I have been practicing since I was little.
The three main steps broken which have been broken down the sake of simplicity. To make the most out of this technique, once you have completed reading the components ...
Now I can't stop checking my messages on the phone to see if she has replied. I know this is fixation but just don't know how to deal with it. What could be a way out of this?
Not much else to do other than to be mindful of it. You see the mind works in the way of habits. The more time spent on something, e.g. thinking about the past or future, that will ...
Buddhism teaches a lasting relationship has four mutual qualities, here: AN 4.55.
It appears obviously both of you do not share these qualities therefore your fixation with the old relationship is unrealistic or deluded. More here.
In summary, simply reflect you are not meant for each other.
Also, since she was previously mad at you, obviously you did ...
I will not accept my own answer to my own question.
But here I found a sutta which allows begging for alms by laypersons.
From SN 7.19:
When the greetings and polite conversation were over, he sat down to
one side and said to the Buddha, “Master Gotama, I seek alms by
legitimate means, which I use to provide for my mother and father. In
doing so, am I doing ...