Questions tagged [attachment]

'Attachment' is a Buddhist concept which is sometimes also translated as 'clinging' or 'grasping'. The Sanskrit and Pali word is *Upādāna*, and the Tibetan is *len.pa (lenpa)*.

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Must I continue a relationship with my abusive parents?

My parents were physically and mentally abusive to me as a child. As an adult, they have never recognized what they have done to me and even try to guilt me into having a relationship with them that I ...
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The Practice of Giving: How to Practice Giving “Thusly”?

In the Diamond Sutra (or Vajra Prajna Paramita Sutra) Buddha says to Subhuti: a Bodhisattva should not dwell anywhere when he gives. He should not dwell in forms when he gives, nor should he dwell ...
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How do I recognize the attachment to certain things?

How do I know whether I am attached to ceratain things or not ? Examples: When we attached to the taste we will trying to find more & more tasty foods. We can reduce that by getting a simple ...
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What is the cause of imaginary dialogues in mind?

Most of the time, I have conversations in mind. Most of them, there is person , interviewing me. Other person: "Why don't you like that ?" Me: "I don't like it because ..." This doesn't happen in ...
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Can trying to control the mind also lead to attachment?

When we become attached to our body, we do workouts, wear make-up and do lots of other things to gain good looks. When we become attached to our money, we work to get more and more money. Similarly, ...
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Rejecting clinging to both pleasure and displeasure

I recently listened to a talk by Ajahn Chah, in which he mentions (@ ~14:20-14:53) that wisdom is found when one clings to neither pleasure nor displeasure. This really created a dilemma in my head ...
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What Buddha's techniques I can use to uproot deep craving for a woman's love?

I am not geographically close to this woman, nor do I ever talk to her, she's just my teenage obsession that lingers on my mind. I am too much attached to my perceptions about how she is, and because ...
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When is it love? When is it attachment?

I have this misunderstanding about love and attachment as they relate to one another. It's hard to put in words, so I'll try with some examples first. My understanding is that love is something you ...
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Attachment to trifling material things

Just a practical question on attachment to trifling material things. I struggle to put it in words but from my younger age, I have a habit of being angry when someone takes a minor item without ...
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Are loving-kindness and compassion (metta and karuna) special kind of attachments?

To alleviate someone from suffering, Buddhism teaches one to practice mettā karuṇā. But it seems to me that to thinking good about someone and wish them the best, we need to have a better version of ...
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In the movie Spring Summer Fall Winter and Spring, why does the master cry?

Here is the movie: Spring Summer Fall Winter and Spring 2003 The plot is that the student having attachment to a woman, leave the temple and marries her. Years fly by, and the student returns because ...
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Are Habits a Kind of Attachment?

Some questions have already touched the nature of habits, namely in the sense of good habits or their benefits. This answer explains how attachment occur from a repeated desire to engage in the ...
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Nature of Spiritual Writings

When I write certain texts, in the presence of inspiration, the topic turns towards high ideals, for example beauty. The phenomenon is odd and prevalent in my life: I have written hundreds of such ...
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SN 12.52 Upadana Sutta

Can one elaborate please more on this quote: "In one who keeps focusing on the allure of clingable phenomena (or: phenomena that offer sustenance = the five aggregates), craving develops. "...
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Attachment Towards Environments and Objects

I have just asked a question about computer use, and it spurred another question in my mind: How does attachment towards objects and places occur? I'm specifically wondering if all pleasurable ...
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Cutting Computer in Evening

I have recently managed to restrict my eating period to about 8h per day, which is supposed to help circadian rhythm. Yet, to further promote sleep and circadian rhythm, I should also cut out blue ...
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What is the Reason for Noble Dukkha and How? [duplicate]

The direct answer to this question is attachment (upadana). To be more specific my question is how attachment become the cause for the Noble Dukkha? Eg: If I like a car, its an attachment. And how ...
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Is there any source saying that Buddhists can temporarily form relationship to help people?

There are many good answers in the question Would Buddhists help non-Buddhists continuing their attachments?. I'll summarize some of the points here: Buddhism only teaches that things don't last, not ...
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Would Buddhists help non-Buddhists continuing their attachments?

Let's take 2 examples: A Buddhist notices a crying girl. After asking it turns out that she lost her mother, and don't know where to find her Alice and Bob has a complicated relationship. Bob wants ...
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Are all forms of Dukkha related to a sense of self?

A few days ago I started reading books about Paticcasamuppada because I realized how little and shallow was my understanding on this capital matter. Despite getting the gist of it, I still have ...
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Addictive Withdrawal and Buddhism

It's well documented in psychology that the cessation of any type of addictive behaviour causes a period of withdrawal. During this period, less pleasure is experienced overall as well as mental ...
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Attachment vs legitimate need

I heard a talk by Ajahn Amaro that says that wherever I encounter dukkha, it is a sign that there is an attachment involved, that I can let go of and this way free myself from the dukkha. https://...
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When would a Buddhist want to attach?

I understand that Buddhism is meant to end sufferings. The Buddhists welcome everything and don't clinging when it's gone. They don't necessary cut existing attachments (knowledge, relationships), but ...
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Is it possible to eliminate all attachments?

Attachment is clearly something that we have all experienced, from a baby who is attached to their mom to an adult who is attached to their family. It is clear that attachment leads to suffering, so ...
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Fame in Buddhism

What is craving for fame in Buddhism? I am aware that fame pertains to the eight worldly concerns and is detrimental. However I wonder: what is fame-seeking in Buddhism? I ask this because when I ...
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Difference Between Belief and Valuing

Just as in Buddhism one's views and self are questions of importance for well being, I noticed my difficulties relating to spirituality relate precisely to those two topics. On the one hand, I don't ...
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Can you reconcile (professional) ambition with buddhism?

I have been a practicioner of mindfulness and vipassana for a few years. I have felt that buddhism is at odds with striving towards professional success and ambition. Ambition and professional success ...
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Is the existence of life & teaching Dhamma a form of attachment?

I read the following comment on the internet (reference): By existing you are attached to this reality. If I die then I won't exist according to Buddhism. Therefore I won't be attached to reality. ...
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How can I end my attachment to holidays?

Every day I look forward to the day when there will be a holiday. Holiday brings a sense of relief to me. However I know this is a false sense of relief as after every holiday there will be a working ...
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“..but don't become attached” Do we have control whether we attach or not?

Often I hear above mentioned phrase in regards to sex, music, entertainment and basically everything else that is or seems important. Now the question is: Do we really have control whether we get ...
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Are monks allowed to have prescriptions? What did the Buddha say of medicine?

Are Buddhist monks allowed to have prescriptions, or would that be considered an attachment? Did the Buddha say anything of medicine?
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How to reconcile non-attachment in a Type-A, North American culture where work is life?

I've been meditating on-and-off for years. However, the non-attachment preached by the Buddha conflicts with the environment around me. I'm in a large urban center in North America. Achievement is ...
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In what situations can letting go of attachments be painful?

From what I understand of the Buddhist path, letting go of attachments shouldn't be painful. Are there times when letting go will be painful and if there is, why are those times different than the ...
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What to do after becoming free from suffering and attachments?

Suppose I'm free from suffering, free from attachments, untouched by pain and pleasure, with absolute, constant calm and peace of mind; feeling profound compassion towards all beings (from an ant, to ...
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Can Buddha be insulted by disrespect? [closed]

I found a video about Leshan Giant Buddha and was watching it with my family. In that video some workers were cleaning the statue's head while walking on it (it is a giant statue) - and my family ...
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How to lose identification with my body and physical appearance

Ever since I was a child I was very look concious. I took pride from my looks and took shame from them as well. I'm at a point where my sense of worth is mainly derived from such an unstable, ...
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Questions on Attachment, Entertainment and Pleasure

Forgive me if I write many questions in a single post, but these all deal with the thematic of attachment. I hope to quit my addictions to pleasures, in major part social media, by gaining insight ...
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How to have a relationship

Every intimate relationship I have ever had has ended in a lot of pain and grief. The last one lasted for 17 years but eventually broke down. That was a year ago and the pain is still very raw at ...
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Being at peace with mental phenomena

In an answer to Non-attachment as object of meditation, there was an interesting idea that the essence of many advanced practices is to be at peace with whatever happens in your phenomenal field - ...
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224 views

Non-attachment as object of meditation

Is there text (e.g. suttas, and/or articles by modern authors) which describes "non-attachment" as an object of meditation? Specifically, how is "non-attachment" an "object"? I'm asking partly ...
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How far is attachment allowed?

My dog has run away and I am sad. To be honest I was probably not taking care of him the best as one possibly could. We both excelled or declined based on my success, but I tried to allow him his own ...
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Attachment and the three poisons

Is there any dependence between these? My understanding is that ignorance is the main cause for samsara (the first of the 12 links of dependent origination). Ignorance meaning not recognizing our true ...
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Do Buddhists need affection, physical touch or intimacy?

I am interested in learning about Buddhism, and there are a lot of questions. I wonder (since it seems to me Buddhists are quite independent, and they don't attach that much to people or things) what ...
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How can I remove my desire for a relationship/girlfriend?

For at least half of my life I've had an extremely strong desire to be in a relationship/have a girlfriend and though I've tried, I've been unsuccessful and this has brought me tremendous suffering to ...
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Is smoking tobacco acceptable in any school of Buddhism?

Is smoking tobacco acceptable in any school of Buddhism? I think it shouldn't be considered acceptable: because of the fifth precept because of the first precept (smoking is physically harmful, so ...
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Is it helpful to stay single if I am not going to become a monk?

In most Buddhist traditions, monks are expected to follow an austere life without being married or involved with another person, but what about lay people who are not going to become monks? ...
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What did the Buddha mean by 'development of the body'?

When that pleasant feeling had arisen in him, it didn't invade his mind and remain because of his development of the body. from MN 36 Maha-Saccaka Sutta translated by Thanissaro. Pleasant feeling (...
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Why do the Noble Truths talk about 'craving', instead of about 'attachment'?

Further to these comments, why do the Noble Truths talk about 'craving', specifically, instead of about 'attachment'? Wouldn't they make as much sense, or even make more sense, if they identified ...
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Attachment to practice itself

Is it wholesome to set expectations for one's own practice (e.g. to have a mind free of all Five Hindrances, or to have all Seven Factors of Awakening present)? To firmly commit to the path of ...
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How to make sense of the Heart Sutra

I am very interested in the concept of emptiness and freeing myself of all attachments. Naturally I gravitated towards the heart sutra, the chant in particular is very moving. However I am completely ...