Please help with these questions! :)

What is the most skillful way to handle someone who is angry?

What is the most skillful way to handle someone who is deluded?

What is the most skillful way to handle someone who is greedy?

And what is the most skillful way to handle the Poisons within me as well?

Metta to all!

  • 1
    Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat. – ChrisW Aug 22 at 10:15

If sone one is ______, then there is so much you can do. Best is one some look inwards and if the situation is creating sensations (pleasant, unpleasant, neutral) know the sensation and note it's implemented. If you get perceptions, thoughts and view that that is subjected to Vipallasa raise thoughts respective thoughts of impermanence, unsatisfactoriness, non/not-self, lack of beauty.

Also, if one can tactfully bring the person to Dhamma then one can try that also. 1st you are to make him receptive to learn the Dhamma.


Part of a definition of "skilful" might be "adapted to specific features of the actual situation", so perhaps this isn't a question which can be answered in general.

Speaking of "handling poison", in case you didn't know, there's a verse about that in the Dhammapada:

  1. If on the hand there is no wound, one may carry even poison in it. Poison does not affect one who is free from wounds. For him who does no evil, there is no ill.

I think there's a detailed example of how to do that in Akkosa Sutta: Insult (SN 7.2).

In honesty though you might find your ability to "carry poison" like that is existent, but temporary or finite. I for example used to find that if someone would trap me in a room and shout at me angrily then after about half an hour I'd begin to get upset (perhaps caused by ears being hurt by the sound pressure) and seek to escape. And at the time I wasn't skilful at alleviating their 'poisons'.

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