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Ven. and good Buddha-Parisata, touched, and who ever interested and willing to give into the matter to get it minded,

Who doesn't know the case where another is perceived as arrogant, either because of having the view "all are equal" or by the feeling to be put on a place which one does not deserve.

What ever the situation actually requires, might be different form ones perception and possible very wrong to give into disapprove or even dislike. Remember the effects of being a person not honor of what is worthy to.

So how to handle such "I can not..." situations for oneself? What's the save bet here, the save way, till possible uproot the cause on an refined level? (Of course in measures of the good Dhamma asked. Related topic: Vanna-maccharia, stinginess in regard of ones reputations: What to practice to get ride of it?)

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(Note that this possibility of grow in Dhamma is not dedicated for trade, exchange, stacks or entertainment but as a means to make merits toward release from this wheel)

  • It would help to have definition of arrogance. It tends to mean different things to different people. – PeterJ Jul 26 at 15:18
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Ven Sirs, Readers,

Arrogance is that one considers oneself better than others. If one finds this is not the case an arrogant person becomes averse. The way to overcome is as follows:

(1) “Sona, when those ascetics and brahmins, by way of form—which is impermanent, suffering,
subject to change—consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they consider thus, but through not seeing things according to reality?

(2) When they, by way of feeling—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change, consider
thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they consider thus, but through not seeing things according to reality?

(3) When they, by way of perception—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change,
consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they consider thus, but through not seeing things according to reality?

(4) When they, by way of formations—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change,
consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they consider thus, but through not seeing things according to reality?

(5) When they, by way of consciousness—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to
change, consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they consider thus, but through not seeing things according to reality?

Sona, when those ascetics and brahmins, by way of form—which is impermanent, suffering,
subject to change—do not consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they not consider thus, but through seeing things according to reality?

When they, by way of feeling—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change, do not consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they not consider thus, but through seeing things according to reality?

When they, by way of perception—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change, do not
consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they not consider thus, but through seeing things according to reality?

When they, by way of formations—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change, do not
consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they not consider thus, but through seeing things according to reality?

When they, by way of consciousness—which is impermanent, suffering, subject to change, do not
consider thus:
‘I am better’ (seyyo’ham asmi), or
‘I am equal [just as good]’ (sadiso’ham asmi), or
‘I am worse’ (hīno’ham asmi)—
why do they not consider thus, but through seeing things according to reality

(1) Now, what do you think, Soṇa, is form permanent or impermanent?”
“Impermanent, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent unsatisfactory [painful] or satisfactory [pleasurable]?”15
“Unsatisfactory, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent, unsatisfactory and subject to change fit to be regarded thus: ‘This is mine,
this I am, this is my self.’?”16
“No, bhante.”

(2) “Now, what do you think, Soṇa, is feeling permanent or impermanent?”
“Impermanent, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent unsatisfactory or satisfactory?”
“Unsatisfactory, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent, unsatisfactory and subject to change fit to be regarded thus: ‘This is mine,
this I am, this is my self.’?”
“No, bhante.”

(3) “Now, what do you think, Soṇa, is perception permanent or impermanent?”
“Impermanent, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent unsatisfactory or satisfactory?”
“Unsatisfactory, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent, unsatisfactory and subject to change fit to be regarded thus: ‘This is mine,
this I am, this is my self.’?”
“No, bhante.”

(4) “Now, what do you think, Soṇa, are formations permanent or impermanent?”
“Impermanent, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent unsatisfactory or satisfactory?”
“Unsatisfactory, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent, unsatisfactory and subject to change fit to be regarded thus: ‘This is mine,
this I am, this is my self.’?”
“No, bhante.”

(5) “Now, what do you think, Soṇa, is consciousness permanent or impermanent?”
“Impermanent, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent unsatisfactory or satisfactory?”
“Unsatisfactory, bhante.”
“Is what is impermanent, unsatisfactory and subject to change fit to be regarded thus: ‘This is mine,
this I am, this is my self.’?”
“No, bhante.”

(1) “Therefore, Soṇa, any kind of form whatsoever, whether past, future or present, internal or
external, gross or subtle, inferior or superior, far or near18—all forms should be seen as they really are
with right wisdom thus:
‘This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self.’

(2) Therefore, Soṇa, any kind of feeling whatsoever, whether past, future or present, internal or
external, gross or subtle, inferior or superior, far or near—all feelings should be seen as they really are
with right wisdom thus:
‘This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self.’

(3) Therefore, Soṇa, any kind of perception whatsoever, whether past, future or present, internal
or external, gross or subtle, inferior or superior, far or near—all perceptions should be seen as they really
are with right wisdom thus:
‘This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self.’

(4) Therefore, Soṇa, any kind of formations whatsoever, whether past, future or present, internal
or external, gross or subtle, inferior or superior, far or near—all formations should be seen as they really
are with right wisdom thus:
‘This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self.’

(5) Therefore, Soṇa, any kind of consciousness whatsoever, whether past, future or present,
internal or external, gross or subtle, inferior or superior, far or near—all consciousness should be seen as
they really are with right wisdom thus:
‘This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self.’

Seeing thus, Soṇa, the learned noble disciple is revulsed [disenchanted] with form, is revulsed
with feeling, is revulsed with perception, is revulsed with formations, is revulsed with consciousness.

Through revulsion, he becomes dispassionate.
Through dispassion, his mind is liberated.
When he is liberated, there arises the knowledge: ‘Free am I!’ He understands: ‘Destroyed is birth.
The holy life has been lived. What needs to be done has been done. There is no more of this state of
being.’

(Māna) Soṇa Sutta

  • That, householder Sirinath, is a total improper answer in an assemble merely void of those having left home, but live in dependency, nurishes householder-equanimity and destroys good communities. So best regarded as the answer of the leader of a herd of cows. A learned and instructed teacher, wishing to appear as such, and suggesting in such way, should know that the path is one of discrimination. – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 15:01
  • look at the "fool" there, he answers with "No, bhante.”... understand? The stand here is on level learn generosity, not even on the level sila, and yet an advice between homeless... saying then even "Bhante" and approaching with only name (disregarding). – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 15:09
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    Maybe I did not understand the question. I am answering at my best effort basis, both to understand as well as writing the answer. – Suminda Sirinath S. Dharmasena Jul 25 at 15:15
  • Especially because good householder comes from a cultural background that has long time trained basics, he surely would have a lot of good advices in regard of respectful and secure. It's a real gift if he shares such rather to try to serve wishes of modern/western world. What is the daily practice to get ride of honor-stinginess and to avoid social overstepping which can be very of disadvantages for one? – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 15:21
  • After Dana, Sila, the answer is total great, yet still there remains "no Bhante" (Sila). – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 15:25
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How to handle aversion that derives from perceiving arrogance?

I understood this answer as saying that there are two types of "conceit" -- conceit includes "comparing one person with another". The two types are "true conceit", and "false conceit". I'm not sure how either of these -- a right comparison or a wrong comparison -- might be a good cause for "aversion".

What he is referring to is that fact that of the nine types of conceit, only three can arise in a sotapanna

Someone with a false conceit might be difficult to relate with, though, difficult to converse with usefully.

There are also the "four great references" -- i.e. if someone says something (e.g. about dhamma, which is what tends to be the topic on this site), then you shouldn't "scorn" it -- but instead, consider and compare it.

If you were someone's teacher then perhaps you might want to help the student see "arrogance" -- there are examples in the literature of teachers doing that.

Maybe it's better if people don't try to do that on this site though, perhaps this was appropriate advice:

In general, unless you actually are the questioner's teacher, don't assume a teacher's mantle

What's the save bet here, the save way, till possible uproot the cause on an refined level?

Perhaps you're expecting a specific answer, I'm not sure which one. Perhaps it's "equanimity" in this case, remembering that "I am heir to my actions" etc.

  • The answer parallel given by Nyom ChrisW "Also try not to get offended if he calls you "householder" or "nyom", I would. Perhaps you're not used to it -- and who knows whether it's representative of Buddhism, other Anglophone monks aren't so formal in their conversation online -- I read it as partly a German mode of speech, like even if he weren't a monk he might be addressing you conversationally "Herr Doktor Peter" or whatever the formal title should be, you can read it as polite. :-)", allthought one could call him arrogant, seeming "teachering" was by far more useful, as teaching good is. – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 14:24
  • If someone wishes to follow and investigate a stream in action: here – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 14:26
  • Speaking of "stream" -- if I try to answer a question it can help me to imagine I know "what" a person is asking about, what "caused" or "triggered" the question -- if it's a general question (like this was), what specific "case" is it a generalisation of? And to answer your questions it might be helpful to know what you posted recently elsewhere on the site. That knowledge ("what comments were posted recently?") isn't obvious to most users, and quickly becomes obsolete. It might make every question clearer, if you were careful to add "... for example, [hyperlink]" when you write a question. – ChrisW Jul 25 at 14:35
  • Good questions, good answers, fit to many, best all, cases. It's a huge hindrance to wish to sort out perfection in a subject-object case, judge mind without being able to read even the own, good householder. So approach of questions best in and of itself and taking own experiances as sample how to release from akusala, and approach the Dhamma (a the wise) for approve to get sure ( Kalama Sutta). Tomorrow nobody would know particular ensnares involved at the case of origin. – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 14:49
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    @SamanaJohann General answers and general questions are rare and valuable -- and difficult to produce. I think the suttas are an example of that kind of literature, and I'm not sure we can write that sort of thing here! Stack Exchange was originally meant for this: You should only ask practical, answerable questions based on actual problems that you face. So I do try to understand what the OP is asking and not only how I might answer from my own experience. – ChrisW Jul 25 at 14:59
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The very question of how to handle, indicates an interference in your being ,and in that very interference ,aversion arises.

Weather you perceived a person correctly or incorrectly as arrogant,is not the problem ,because thats what your being had perceived already,what your being had understood already,Its neither good nor bad,only an indication of your being's wisdom .The only problem is intervening in the development of your being.There is no need to perceive the situation correctly ,whatever was perceived by your being is the reality ,till further notice.

If no intervention occurs your being will develop naturally and act more wisely next time .

  • Ignorance the path to awakening. Well, good householder, take care. – Samana Johann Jul 25 at 23:35
  • Yes,if there is attitude towards ignorance then aversion is bound to arise ,it indicates attachment to knowledge.Accepting ignorance is also a path.. – Omar Boshra Jul 26 at 8:26

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