What did Buddha say about dysfunctional families for novice practitioners? What advice did he give for novice practitioners in order to have a good practice as being a novice such impediments as a dysfunctional and painful family can impact practice in a negative manner? What precautions should one take? Should one go no-contact, is that skillful?
Elsewhere, Buddha has mentioned that one cannot repay the debts of the parents and even in the Mangala Sutta it is mentioned that one should be helpful to relatives. However, if being in contact with dysfunctional families makes us lose our faith in ourselves and makes us angry and hateful all the time, this is a huge impediment to practice especially as a novice. I know that one should learn to have compassion for these people and see them as afflicted by delusions. However the transgressions are so huge and the fact that I am a novice makes me feel guilty that I cannot feel the compassion. I have tried Metta meditation and also analyzing them using the 5 ways to overcome hatred. At this point nothing is helping. I am just filled with this ball of anger and hatred inside me constantly. I am afraid that I am generating more negative mind-states by being in contact with this dysfunctional system. There is a lot of dysfunction and its so painful, to the point that I am losing my self-esteem and have started doubting my worth as a human -being. There is constant lies, manipulation, slandering... I am losing my faith in myself as a human being.
All advice to deal with this situation from the Suttas, and practical advice from personal experiences, will be appreciated. Please remember, this is for a novice. High spiritual ideals like compassion etc are great, but they are not helpful for me right now.