2

I really know what does love means even my prior question was also "What does love means?" but as I'm going through. When I tried to let person know I'm loving then it gets angry at me so how love conquer anger/hate when I found person hates me. Neither has affection nor kindness towards me, no respect for my feelings towards that person. So is this love crime that I found someone who I Iove hates me after knowing I'm loving that person. I don't know what's their psychology or perspective of love. So I've question that is love crime?

Improve this question
1
  • 1
    Sometimes when you're attracted to someone, those feelings of yours will be reciprocated, sometimes they won't. If they're not, people can react in all sorts of ways, from hostility to shock to mild amusement etc. You should accept the other person's reaction gracefully, and if there's no hope of romance let go of your love.
    – user10515
    May 2, 2017 at 7:20

3 Answers 3

Reset to default
7

Swapnil,

Love does never conquere anger and hatred but is actually the reason of it.

Look how angry you are, aren't you? And why?

Love is simply greed and it's not proper to blame another trader of not taking your deal, or?

Of course it's not a crime perse, but actally the reason for all crimes in this world. To deal unfair, in cases where others do not like to trade with this dangerous item, lead also often to direct "love-crimes"

That is why the Buddha and wise people taught and teach, "Suffering comes from what is dear" and to make best nothing neither dear nor put anger into it.

And since no being loves any thing more as him/herself, on should not harm others and derive them from their beloved.

(Note: This is a gift of Dhamma and not meant for commercial purposes or other wordily gains.)

Improve this answer
5
  • Yeah, I know 'Piyavagga' but I'm in search of my life partner so I just expressed my mind my feelings , affection, love, kindness for that person. I wouldn't agree with if it's reason for all crime. I mean who is wisdom wouldn't be criminal because of love. I would let you know person not knowing Piyavagga or Buddhism really so I really really don't understand their perspective of love. I know that every thing end with sorrow but this is it.
    – Swapnil
    May 1, 2017 at 12:57
  • As told, if the is no love there is no killing. Its not always called crime in normal sociaty, but looking a little bit deeper also Swapnil will see how much he had killed for it, and not only good and cool mood. "But this is it", if such would be a proper approach to suffering that the compassion of the Buddha for his alternative was useless and you also could stop to do conductive harm in regard of defilements and just live like an animal. There are alternatives much more refine then sensual pleasures which always cause harm and also a way even beyound this refinded pleasure.
    – user11235
    May 1, 2017 at 14:12
  • And having a partner or not, one will be aways alone, just experiance sign, sound, smell, tast, touch, thoughts, e.g. the world for one self and just for one self, created for one self. Thinking that far, are you even really relayed to the world you experiance? Or is it not so that all this is also not lasting, makes no sense and can not be regarded as refuge? So why not seeking after hardwood, now where there is the seldom chance, rather to invest in meaningless and turn on in that wheel?
    – user11235
    May 1, 2017 at 14:19
  • Ok I'm agreed 'This is it' I mean I've decided to live as layman and not as monk. So that circumstances give me nice choice itself now I'm thinking to find one who practicing Buddhism and that wouldn't hurt me ever that person would be wiser and wisdom as practicing Buddhism so I've to stop what I was looking for like silly. Thank you.
    – Swapnil
    May 2, 2017 at 6:26
  • 1
    Samajivina Sutta: Living in Tune and mudita.
    – user11235
    May 2, 2017 at 6:32
2

Love is a hard word to interpret. For simplicity let's use the two generally used words

  1. Selfish love
  2. Unconditional love

Selfish love is generally unhealthy and in a Buddhist context means "loba" (craving) and may lead to "dwesha" (anger). This is harmful for you and the other person.

Unconditional love is generally healthy and in a Buddhist context means "alobha" (non craving) and usually is also "adhosha" (non angry). This is not harmful for you and the other person.

In normal life, love is something which mixes these two from time to time; hence a mix of good and bad.

Improve this answer
3
  • I'm agreed but I wonder their psychology and perspective of love. Even they not kind person to whom who love them. I really wonder this phenomena of mind or tendency.
    – Swapnil
    May 2, 2017 at 6:38
  • 1
    @Swapnil it might be useful to think why you love this person. Then think it those reasons are kusal (merits) or akusal (demerits).
    – Ravindranath Akila
    May 2, 2017 at 11:25
  • @Rvindranath Akila Reason is I found wiser (wisdom) person and want to marry that person. So I accepted answer and got what I must've.
    – Swapnil
    May 6, 2017 at 4:51
2

You can see how anger causes more anger? Aversion causes more aversion? The ideal in Buddhism would be if you could cultivate wisdom or metta. Then you could better keep loving other people as friends regardless of hate or love. Acceptance of the anger, equanimity, impartiality and loving everyone even when you are loving just one. No one can hurt your feelings, we all hurt our own feelings by reacting to them. -metta

Improve this answer
1
  • So perhaps the 'particularity' of the OPs love is the 'crime' that he is feeling? Attachment changes the love from a freely given gift to one with some expectation?
    – user2341
    May 2, 2017 at 11:37

You must log in to answer this question.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged .